Today, I will let you in on a 30 years old secret- a secret on how to express your love better, especially in today’s world of social media. We millennials believe that sharing a post and writing a post is equivalent to expressing love.

However, expressing love outside the digital media is where our struggle really lies. Surely, you may show your love for your partner on a regular basis, but do you take the time to make sure you are communicating it in the way your partner prefers?

If you think this defines your state of affairs, learning about Love Languages can guide you in your interpersonal relationships.

What are love languages?

A marriage counselor, Dr. Gary Chapman, noticed that many couples had similar complaints about their marriage. He identified that most individuals struggle to express love in intentional and meaningful ways.

Dr. Chapman called various ways of expressing and receiving love the “5 Love Languages.” These love languages can be found not only in romantic relationships but also in relationships with family, friends, and even coworkers!

What are the different kinds of love languages?

Different individuals with different personalities show love in different ways. Moreover, the same person may have a different love language in different relationships. As a result, even love can sometimes get lost in translation when two partners speak different love languages.

The five love languages that describe the way we feel loved and appreciated are:

What is my partner’s and my love language?

Every person has at least one language that they prefer above the other. You can even have two or more languages expressing love. If you are unable to gauge your love language, try identifying it with a love language quiz.

How will your relationship benefit from love languages?

Apart from aiding personal growth, where you grow and bring about change in yourself, your commitment to learning your partner’s language of love will promote selflessness in the relationship.

Further, it creates a space to empathize with your partner, to understand what matters to them truly. It also maintains intimacy with your partner as you learn and connect in a deeper and more meaningful manner.

How to express love in my partner’s language?

Coming to the other half of the secret is how you can display the love that your partner needs and appreciates. Understanding the differences in love expression and decoding these various ways of showing love will help you reduce the guesswork of your partner’s expectations and needs.

If your partner’s love language is Words of Affirmations, then attempt at not engaging in nonconstructive criticism; as for them, words can have a lasting impression. Make sure to compliment and appreciate their efforts.

For a partner whose language is Quality Time, you need to carve out time from your schedule. Make attempts at having heart-to-heart conversations and engage in couple activities.

With a partner believing in Acts of Services, you need to display little acts of help that can make all of the difference.

If Gifts are what your partner needs to feel beloved, you need to be thoughtful of what you gift them as they value sentiments more than their monetary value.

Lastly, if your partner enjoys physical engagement, then a tender caress, pat on the back, squeezing their arm, or back massages are everything.

Despite these efforts, if you struggle to express and receive love, you can book a counseling session to personally discuss your relationship’s nuances.

Conclusion

Love languages are a useful tool to enhance how you can communicate and express yourself to your partner, but it shouldn't be the be-all-and-end-all solution to your relationship concerns.

Instead, it should serve as a starting point for couples to begin a journey to better understand each other and self-regulate, resulting in a happy, healthy, and fulfilling relationship.

What do you think is your love language?